Toilets again...

I apologise for going back to my preoccupation with toilets but something wildly exciting has happened in the last few days in Nzige...I have a bathroom! Now if I was looking around for a house to rent in Bristol and I saw a bathroom like this I must admit I’d be backing out the door faster than I can say ‘Massive Attack’ but everything is relative in this life, and relative to that tiny outside hole which was so small it took an expert aim (no chance if you are a girl) and where water continually dripped on my head this room is like the ladies at the Savoy or Ritz or any other posh hotel you can think of.

There are a couple of problems. The first is that I apologise if I sound rather high while writing this. The paint which they have used for the walls is giving off this noxious solvent smell which feels like it is destroying those poor remaining cells of grey matter. They cling precariously to my inner brain like limpets do to a rock but realistically, they don’t stand a chance. I do hope I wake up again in the morning...I guess only time will tell. If I do not turn up to the education steering group meeting in Kigali tomorrow it will be because of inadvertent solvent inhalation that was not due to using snowman marker pens in an enclosed space for once. I want the slogan from snowman marker pens inscribed upon my grave ‘beware of imitation’.

 The other problem is water. The taps on the sink look beautiful and so does the toilet but....lets just say its a case of many bowls and buckets on standby. But seriously, I’m delighted. I can now actually listen to Lionel Ritchie in the shower if I so desire and I can spend ages preening myself and rearranging my hair in the....wait for it....MIRROR! I know, it is sad but I think that is what I am actually the most excited about. I now have a mirror big enough to see my whole head and shoulders. It does mean that I now will actually know that I look like an oompalumpa from all that red dust when I leave the house though. On second thoughts, perhaps it is better not to be able to see yourself properly...ignorance is bliss....